The chronicles and ramblings of a stay-at-home father raising his three beautiful girls, Anya Rose, Caitlin Rose and Reegan Rose.

Monday, March 19, 2012

A cut above the rest...

The lousy March weather continues out here in Western Washington, with highs in the 40's and almost constant rain.  It wouldn't be so bad if my friends back in Minnesota were getting pounded by snow and freezing rain, but when I go on Facebook and see pictures of my pale-skinned friends wearing shorts and tank tops, I get pissed.  

"Can you believe another 80 degree day in March!"
"Hellllllllooooo Summer!"
"Nothing but blue skies here in Minnesota!"

Last year in March you could literally walk from our driveway up the 8 foot snow mounds onto our roof.  I'm not bitter or anything, but I'd rather see posts like:

"FML! Another freezing day!"
"I spent 2 hours driving 4 miles to work.  DAMN SNOW!
"My uncle had another heart attack shoveling snow this morning.  Please keep him in your prayers."

Okay the third one was a bit too far, but you catch my drift.

Being inside has allowed my Roses to get creative with their indoor play activities.  For instance, last night the girls went upstairs and played beauty salon.  They were having a blast up in their room!  Alicia and I were able to snuggle together and watch a few episodes of Storage Wars before the entourage came back downstairs.  While it's not unusual for them to play nicely for a while, but I should have known that any activity that keeps them from fighting for more than 45 minutes spells disaster.  Caitlin was the first down the stairs and she was as giddy as a school girl.  In usual KK fashion she was rambling some nonsense about Reegan looking like a boy and how fun it is to play beauty salon.  It wasn't until she handed me a pair of scissors that I began to worry.  A minute later, our mop-headed two year old ran down the steps to showcase her new hairdo to Alicia and I. When I first saw Reegan's Lloyd Christmas-style hair, I had to leave the room.  I started laughing uncontrollably.  Alicia wasn't able to see the humor in the situation and erupted up the stairs.  While she was reaming out the girls, I was finally able to regain my composure and put on a united parental front against the woes of underage haircutting. 

We had to wash the sheets on the bed and vacuum the floor, and aside from our daughter looking like a character from Dumb and Dumber, no permanent damage was done.

This morning, our first activity was to get to Great Clips to see if the stylist could transform our little monster back into a child who didn't resemble a Garbage Pail Kid.  While Reegs sat patiently as Anya 'trimmed' her bangs, she threw a shit-fit when a 40-year-old Vietnamese women tried.  I restrained Reegan on my lap for 40 minutes as the stylist tried to even out her hair.  The end result turned out pretty good; kind of a mangy Ellen Degeneres look.  The good news is that her hair will eventually grow back, the bad news is that until it does, people around the neighborhood will be gossiping about the butch ass haircut I gave my daughter.

Tip of the Day - Time can fix all things, except the indelible scars you leave on your children, time just makes those things worse.

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Happy Leap Year

I could tell for the past few weeks that this year's Leap Day was going to be something special. Only a desperate Leap Year fool would attempt to face the masses at the malls, that's why this year we kept it simple; a Super Leap Year Extravaganza Pinata Party! 

A few days ago, my 5 year old had the bright idea to make some pinatas.  Where she came up with it, I have no idea.  While I give arts and crafts the old college effort, it doesn't take a trained eye to see that I don't know what the hell I'm doing.  Not wanting to let my daughter down, I spent the next half hour doing in-depth research on the history and craftsmanship of high quality pinatas (I googled 'Dummies guide to Pinata Making...and it didn't take a half hour, I spent 2 minutes of hardcore research followed by 28 minutes Facebooking my brother-in-laws, wife's, best friend from college who is managing a restaurant in Guatemala).

We dumped all that was left of our flour supply into a medium sized bowl and added a few cups of water.  As I stood over the congealing solution, I wondered, what the hell did I get myself into. My Roses were dressed in their Sunday's finest, all three in new sweater dresses and tights.  Anya carefully dipped her newspaper into the mache paste and tenderly laid it on her balloon.  Caitlin followed suit and slowly wetted her paper.  Reegan took notice of the other girls but decided a two handed dunking motion would be most appropriate for this activity.  After realizing her newspaper was grossly over saturated, she wrung it out, and wiped the excess paste on her dress, her hair, and the kitchen rug.  It was at this time we made the unanimous decision that we really only needed two pinatas for our Leap Day celebration.

After Caitlin and Anya finished (and I bathed Reegan in the sink) I set the pinatas in the garage to dry.  We settled down on the guest bed to watch on of the girls favorite movies, Beauty and the Beast. As a way to feel more apart of the movies they watch, the girls always pick which character they would like to be.  As you could probably guess, KK always picks the character with the prettiest dress and Anya chooses the person with the most dominant role.  Reegan on the other hand, always wants to be the bad guy.  Her favorite characters include; Swiper, Gaston, the Wicked Witch of the West, Scar, Mother Gothell (Tangled) and The Cat in the Hat (I guess he's not 'bad' but he does annoy the hell out of me).  My little femme fatale loves to be the villain.  Hopefully she outgrows her stubbornness and her attraction to the morally challenged before middle school, or this dad is going to end up in the nut house!

Once the pinatas dried, I took the girls to the grocery store and let them pick out some treats to put inside.  They chose Skittles and, for some reason, Sixlets. I thought production on that M&M wannabe had been halted years ago with OK Soda and Go-Go boots, but I was wrong.  After dinner last night, the girls helped us clean up (they played in the other room and tried, though unsuccessfully, to not make a bigger mess of the house) and after dishes were put away, we started the festivities.  The girls put on a blindfold and each took turns hitting the pinatas with a foam sword.

The randomness and spontaneity of the night made it a lot of fun. Never had I had a more memorable Leap Day.  And so from this day forth, the Schmidt's shall start the Leap Day tradition of joyous celebration and pinata-breaking merriment.  Fours years can't come soon enough.

Tip of the Day - Add a little spice to your life, unless you have irritable bowel syndrome, then stick to your usual spice intake.